Movie Review: Snow White And The Huntsman

We had the baby version now lets have the dark version!

Rating: PG-13
Time: 127 min

The fact that two versions of the same movie come out in the same 6 months is so dumb!
Mirror Mirror was terrible, cheesy and boring so lets this one!
This movie was dark, it did not make you feel good and that's what was smart and well done about it.
The bad guy is an actual bad guy, she has no mercy and she actually has a point of being the bad guy.
She's not friends with Snow White, she locks her in a prison cell and in front of her kills the king (her dad.)
And I hate Kristen Stewart, I think she plays the same roll in every movie, dull and sad.
But in this movie it works because how would you feel if you saw your dad being murdered and you were locked up in a stinky gray room for your whole life.
That's another thing I liked, I think all the actors fit their part very well.
I liked Chris Hemsworth, I thought he fit the part very well.
Now what I didn't like, I didn't like the plot, I thought it was confusing and not very well thought out.
The movie felt like it didn't give any time to think it just blasted you with a whole bunch of stuff all at once.
There is too much action!
There's this one scene in the movie where they're in a valley of peace and faries, they see this majestic unicorn and then it gets an arrow straight through the head!
I also didn't connect with the dwarves, they didn't really do anything in the movie and some of them were normal sized people.
I also thought that there were some things in there that are unexpected but dumb!
Like when she escapes from the tower there just happens to be a horse there waiting for her.
Anyways I would recommend this movie to anyone has nothing to do on the weekend.

Score=5.5

Next movie is from the guy who brought you Bedtime Stories. (Adam Sandler edition!)

Movie Review: Men In Black 3

BACK IN TIME!

Rating: PG-13
Time:106 min

Now personally I hate the men in black series.
I haven't seen the second but people tell me it's worst then the first and to me the first STUNK!
Anyways in this one Tommy Lee Jones looks like poo.
I heard he got surgery or something, anyways it looks terrible.
But I thought the match Josh Brolin and Will Smith had was good unique and at some points maybe even funny.
Which brings me to my next point!
The humor in this movie wasn't much, and when there was humor it wasn't that funny.
The bad guy I thought was kind of all over the place and that they didn't really plan him that well.
I thought the plot and the clues were everywhere and that they were just so messy.
Now there's this one guy in the movie who tells the future played by Michael Stuhlbarg and to me that guy made the whole movie to me.
I loved his character and I thought that him being so positive on the outside but having sadness sorrow and a mystery on the inside was just great.
I would recommend this movie to any fans of past MIB's.

Score=6.5

Next movie is with Nick Frost as a very small guy.

Movie Review: The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

This movie I wasn’t planning to see but when my mom wanted to see a movie and it was the only movie in the theater that I haven’t seen. So we went.

Rating: PG-13
Time: 124 min

I was surprised by this movie, the trailer looked bad and unappealing to children, but when I came out of that theater then I was surprised how much I liked it!
This movie was actually really intense, and the jokes that they had were actually really funny.
Why I liked this movie is because it’s not a loud Hollywood movie.
It’s quiet movie and you actually enjoy looking at it. (I know it sounds weird.)
The colors are really pretty and they keep you locked in.
The story can be a little hard to keep up with but finally you understand things.
And the saying that the hotel manager says all the time is such a good quote and I love it!
“Everything will be alright in the end. And if it is not alright then it is not the end.”
Man I love that quote!
Calm adults who don’t like screaming and explosions will love this movie.
Even though I didn’t get bored most other kids probably will.

Score=8.5

The next movie is the third of a classic comic.

Movie Review: The Dictator

This movie is like SNL's brother. It's funny...

Rating: R
Time: 83 min

Sacha Baron Cohen has made some movies before but they’re in the style of a documentary so when this came out as a normal movie then people wanted to see what would happen.
I didn’t see Borat or Bruno but I’ve heard that this movie was the worst one out of the three.
I can’t agree with that because I don’t know that.
Anyways this movie is about this terrible dictator that goes to America. He has to sign a paper to make his country a free country when things go wrong and people want to kill him.
Anyways in this movie there are jokes around every corner, you expect that you’re going to hear a joke and you do.
It’s a movie where things are really expected.
Sacha Baron Cohen, I would have to say, was the one who was the only one who was really trying.
Everyone else I expected more from, his accent is a little hard to understand so if you have good ears you’ll understand.
This movie is offensive to everyone, so there are jokes where you’ll be “Ha! That’s really funny!” and times where you go “That’s not funny! That’s offensive!” it’s just how his movies go.
I wouldn’t recommend this movie to everyone, there are some pretty inappropriate parts where kids and maybe even adults will feel a little or a lot disturbed.
I recommend this movie to people who don’t care if they’re offended and teens to older.
You won’t get bored at all!

Score=5.5

Next movie is an drama about retiring.

Movie Review: Dark Shadows

Q: Is it a fact that Johnny Depp is in every Tim Burton film?
A: YES!

Rating: PG-13
Time: 113 min

Anyways this movie is one of those movies where it had a lying commercial that made it look so good! So props to the person who made the trailer!
This is such a Tim Burton film! It looks like it’s going to be funny but then out of nowhere BLAM! Johnny Depp slaughters a whole bunch of hippies!
In the end of the movie there is this whole fight and it’s just so freaky and so stupid at the same time!
This movie is one of those movies where it’s expected what’s going to happen and when it’s not expected it’s stupid!
There are some cute jokes but even though I put this in comedy even though it looks funny, 9/10 of it’s serious or just not funny.
And the wigs that they wear are SO FAKE! It’s like they have a budget of 100$
There are lots of special effects with everything!
This make look like it may be for kids, it’s not. It’s all about love, mating and slaughtering people.
It’s one of the worst Tim Burton films probably ever.
This is not a heart-warming movie. It’s the opposite.
I recommend this movie to anyone who hates life or doesn’t know a good movie.
Rating=4.5
Next movie is new and FUNNY!

Not A Movie Review, But Still Involves Actors And Acting.

So as it says on the top, the title this is not a movie review!
But it is a story that I have been waiting to tell you!
So one day my mom, me and my brother went to a play on Broadway.
This play was called Other Desert Cities and it was a drama so I was not looking forward to it.
Anyways during intermission we saw Tobey Maguire and my brother went up to him to get his autograph.
We didn't know it then but sitting next to him was Leo Dicaprio with a really low baseball cap and a giant fake beard.
So I was sad we didn't get his autograph.
Anyways BYE!

Movie Review: The Avengers

Two words AWE-SOME!

Rating: PG-13
Time: 142 min

When I went into the theater I was hoping that this movie was going to be amazing.
When I came out I was scarred of awesomeness!
The movie is never boring and is exactly what I wanted.
In the beginning of the movie all of the Avengers aren’t getting along and that’s exactly how it would happen in real life.
But them not getting along causes them to fight each other when in the end they have to fight with each other.
This movie broke the record of most money on opening weekend. That was more then 200,000,000$ that is #1 movie in history.
The fights are epic and even though it’s really long you want it to be longer!
And what I have been saying to all my friends is that it was the perfect combination of suspense, action and comedy.
Iron Man makes a couple of jokes but the Hulk made these two jokes that made the audience clap.
I couldn’t of asked for anymore!
I would recommend this movie to anybody who knows a good time.
Rate=9.0